Well damn. I need to be more active.
I say that like I will be.
Um, well my last journal entry was for Halloween, I realize. So I thought that a new one would be good to write about my
life updates. XDD
Thanksgiving was... Meh. My dad got mad at me cause we didn't have a turkey to cook for it and repeatedly told me the day before that I ruined Thanksgiving for us. The story behind that is that we were supposed to get a free basket with a turkey to cook and boxes for stuffing and all that jazz, but we didn't get it cause I didn't answer the door. Reason being was that my dad and stepmom said that the baskets were limited and that they gave them all out already cause we were supposed to get our basket like, the week before but we didn't. So when they actually did come, I didn't answer the door cause I don't open the door unless I know who it is. <Don't wanna talk to any Bible thumpers.</s> They also called my phone like, twice but I also didn't answer cause I don't answer any numbers that I don't know. What I think is that if it's important, they will leave a voicemail, but these people didn't so I didn't know. So later on when my dad came home from work, he was pissed when he found out and was yelling at me, calling me stupid and all that. I cried for about a good 2 hours cause when someone tells me I ruined something, it doesn't sit well with me AT ALL.
He even bitched about it a bit into the next morning but thankfully he eventually stopped. He did accuse me of leaving the house and that's why I didn't answer the door. Like, dude. No. It was pretty dark out already so hell no am I sneaking out anywhere, especially when I can't drive yet. My dad also has this rule that I can't leave the house unless he gives me the okay. Same goes for if I want anyone to come over. I'm 18 and my life really isn't progressing much at all. :/
On another note, last week on Tuesday I went to hang out with my group of friends and my (now ex) boyfriend. My moirail went, too and I was incredibly happy cause hell, I hardly get to see her at all cause my dad hates her and thought I stopped talking to her a long time ago. He has no idea we still talk and all that but seriously. I don't really understand him sometimes. My moirail is the sweetest person that I know and I'm glad we're so close. I wouldn't choose anyone else if I were given the choice.
But yeah, also during the time when my friends and I were hanging out, we had a fun time at the mall for the few hours that we were there. I felt really happy, which is what made what I did before we all left that much harder. I broke up with my boyfriend. He seemed to take it okay; he was glad that I did it face to face n stuff but he also told me that if I ever wanted to get back together, he'd give me another chance but it would be the last. >.> Reason why I broke up with him wasn't because of anything bad that he did. He's way nice and cute and just wanted me to be happy, which is what many - if not all - people want, right? Well, I think I just kind of lost interest. I grew distant and hardly talked to him, and when we did it was either brief or ended with me being incredibly irritated for no reason at all. I don't really know. I need to get my feels in order cause hell, he really doesn't deserve me being that way to him. I don't know if I'll get back together with him or not. At this moment in time I'm just kind of really fed up with my love life so I think I'll stay in the single lane for a while until it comes up that I start feeling something for someone again.
Ahh, I also have an Archive of Our Own account now. Not sure if I mentioned that before? I'm too lazy to check. But yeah, I posted most of my work there except for Story of Evil and Light Behind Your Eyes. Cause those have song lyrics in them and I dunno, rules about song lyrics and stuff and I don't want to get banned or anything so just to be safe, I didn't post those. I'm getting a few kudos and comments on my work. All good things but every time I just think in my mind "FUCK."
because people are expecting me to write more of the chapter stories. I know I got a bunch of the same things on Fanfiction.net but holy crap after posting on AO3, it brought it to the front of my mind and it's kinda a bit overwhelming cause I can't write the next chapters unless I get obsessed over the fandom again and the fact that I need to do that makes me wanna punch myself in the face. ._. I'm hoping to be able to get the motivation to write more chapters to the ones that I need to write more to but god... I'm in the middle of writing a SolKat humanstuck fanfic and even that is going by very very fucking slowly. It's already been maybe almost 2 months and I'm still not done with the first chapter. Like, dude. I need to get my act together. I'm not even doing anything except watching Netflix practically everyday and just eating.
I didn't add sleeping cause I've been finding myself staying up until 5 or 7 in the morning for no real good reason.
(Here's the link to my AO3 if anyone wants it archiveofourown.org/users/Kare…
Wow, I wrote a lot. Is anyone even gonna read this? Probably not but oh well, I typed my thoughts down. My stress level has dimmed down ever so slightly so it's okay. I think I'm gonna go eat now cause I've neglected to do so and it's already 8 at night. >.<