[Warning] Rant ahead:
I'm so done right now with all of the bullshit going on right now in my life. Basically last Wednesday, my dad came home early when I had snuck some people over to my house without him knowing. It was Teal BullShittakeMushroom
, Laura zaki-mizer
, Eric DarkRebel96
, and Teal's boyfriend Bryce. Basically we hid Eric in the closet cause it would have been even worse if my dad had found out he was there and he ended up meeting everyone else. There's a strict rule that there's no boys in the house and I obviously broke that rule. In front of my friends, he put on a show that he was fine and not mad. We were able to get Eric out of the house without my dad knowing by using Bryce's messed up car as a decoy. Bless him for that. So yeah... Laura was able to spend the night and bless her for that too. But the next day on Thursday, Laura took a shower and during that time, my dad proceeded to pretty much yell at me about the night prior's little incident. Laura felt super awkward during then cause she could hear this crap going on. For the rest of the day though, he stopped and put up a facade for the duration that Laura was there. But once we took her home, he started up with the yelling again. Basically he told me that me inviting friends over without him knowing is "selling him out," and that I take my friend's side over his and all that stuff. A lot of the argument was just him making accusations though. For Friday there was no further incident. Same for Saturday, pretty much. But then around 5 in the morning on Sunday, I got up out of my room of pretending to sleep cause I needed to pee. And when I do that, I like to be really silent cause I mean, it's just a form of habit. My dad was still up and I peeked around the corner of the wall and he saw me and I went to see what he was doing and I basically caught him watching porn. He started laughing about it and so I did too, cause it would have been even more awkward if I didn't. He ended up getting mad though, because he claims I was "being a creeper" and that I invaded his privacy. Technically, I did. But I mean, it was never an issue with him before when I used to peek around the corner to see if he was sleeping or watching tv or something or took a look at what he was doing on the computer. It was NEVER AN ISSUE before now, which is stupid. So I was just apologizing for it but he wouldn't have it and basically, he started going off on a tangent like he always fucking does and then started yelling at me about how he thinks Teal is a bad influence and that he doesn't want me seeing her anymore and also how much he hates Eric. Like, he has no good reason to not like Eric, to be honest. None at all. He literally only makes accusations towards Eric and a few accusations toward Teal as well but for Teal he does bring up some stuff that's truth but like, he makes everything seem so much worse than it is. We were basically arguing for a good hour or so and he got so mad that he told me he wanted to punch me in the face so many times. And like, during the argument he kept calling me a retard, an asshole, and a bitch. I'm not allowed to close my bedroom door anymore cause he said that I don't get any privacy cause apparently I "don't respect his." Like wtf. So we went to bed then when we woke up the next day, I went to go iron his shirt for work like I always do, and the entire time he just kept being mad and insulting me and stuff. :// After he left, I basically cleaned the entire house except for my room. When he got home that night, he just started up with being an asshole again. He told me to "get the fuck up an cook him something to eat." In which I did. I was cooking him corned beef with onions. But like, the key looking thing that you use to open the corned beef can broke in the middle of me using is so I had to open it with a can opener and my dad came up behind me saying that I'm stupid for not using the key thing and when I told him it broke, he told me that I'm useless for not being able to open a can right. :// Then when I was in the process of just starting to cut up the onions he told me, "the food's not done yet? Jesus Christ, how fucking slow and useless can you be?" I just ignored it and started actually cooking once I finished cutting up the onions. Then when the food was about halfway cooked, he just all of a sudden says "I don't want to eat that anymore. It smells like shit. Cook me hot dogs or something. If you put that food in front of me, I'll throw it away." You can only guess how stressed about all this I already was. But like, my stepmom was there an came into the kitchen to help me finish up cooking and my dad walked up telling me, "wow, you can't even cook this on your own? Fucking wow." And just, my stepmom got the food together for her and my dad and told me to go into the bedroom and she took the food to him, which he ended up not even eating cause he told me to put it away. After that he also came into the room telling me to text Teal and tell her to never come to my house again, to delete Bryce's number from my phone, and tell Eric that I never want to see him again. In which after I heard that I told him, "so you want me to break up with him." and he replied, "no." so I proceeded to tell him that me telling Eric that I never want to see him again is basically breaking up with him, and my dad said nothing about that subject anymore and left my room. Then today when we woke up so he could get ready for work, he didn't say more than two words to me. Which, in my opinion, is better than him being a dick and talking shit to me.
All in all, after all of that bullshit, I'm talking to my friends about this right now in a skype call and they're telling me that I need to get out of this house. That at this point, all my dad is doing is verbally and emotionally abusing me, in which they're pretty much right. They're suggesting I go live with one of them for a while till I get my bearings and stuff, and I want to, but at the same time I don't want to inconvenience them and their parents. But yes, by now, I'm really considering just packing some of my stuff and leaving. But instead of packing up and leaving right now, I'm gonna pull through it tonight and talk to my stepmom about all this tomorrow. Cause it's just too much stress and I'm getting fed up with all this. ://